My Manifesto: The Incoherent Ramblings of a Madman

Last night was terrible! My alarm clock was all out of whack because the power went off. The alarm came on and I kept rolling over in a half sleepy daze and hitting snooze about 5 or 6 times. Not overly sure because i was still sleeping. Then I gradually woke up some more and thought it strange that there was no light outside. It turns out I'd snoozed from 3am to 4am - Ugh!

Hmm...I have no idea what I was going to post. The end.

Waspwars: the Wasps Strike Back

Day two of the wasp wars and our hero, Adam the Great, was gloating of his victorious battle. The wasps, not to be outdone, had merely been regrouping. Biding their time. Getting ready for the offensive. As Adam the Great slowly drove the car to the garage, near the wasps base-camp, they attacked. Running around screaming like a girl while getting bitten by at least three possibly four wasps, our hero, Adam the Great, while running away in fear managed to grab fly spray and run back chasing the wasps into the distance.

Learning from his previous battles, our hero, Adam the Great, has been preparing with long lasting surface spray and a baseball bat ready in anticipation for the return of the wasps. For even though they have been banished to the furthest edge of the univerise - they will return - and when they return - Adam the Great will be victorious in battle again.

Early Warning: New Date Rape Drug Used By Females!!!!

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. Many females use a date rape drug on the market called "Beer."

The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large "kegs". Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them. A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex.

Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women whom they would never normally be attracted. After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that "something bad" occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship." In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage." Men are much more susceptible to this scam after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

Please! Forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim to this "Beer" scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men. For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the phonebook.

For a video to see how beer works click on web site below:

http://www.brackenspub.com/beer.swf

"ATM fees $600m and rising: report - AAP"

Australians are paying almost $600 million a year to withdraw money from automatic teller machines - and the figure is set to soar.

Banks made $583 million a year from ATM withdrawal fees, up $83 million in the past 12 months, and would continue lifting fees, newspaper reports said today.

Well - when you're on a good thing you may as well stick to it.

They've changed my jogging oval into a cricket oval for summer. Today marks the day where I cannot see the sprinting lanes marked anymore. RIP my oval - until we meet again.

There's all of these people lining the ocean footpath today. Binoculars in hand. All in their best beach attire. Cameras in hand. Looking outward into the ocean - I thought there must've been a school of whales (school? heard? flock?) that they were all looking at, either that or they were just there to cheer me on as i jogged, because it surely could not have been the boat in the distance. As i jogged along further I realised that it was indeed the boat they were looking at. I cannot for the life of me work out why so many people would turn up to look at a cruise ship. Unless of course it was about to dock and was full of drunken bikini models - and if it was about to dock and full of bikini models then the joke was surely on me.

I swatted the wasps out of their nest. I quickly hit it to the ground - danced around in circles like a girl - ran for the cover of my car - drove over the nest three to four times - and then drove quickly inside to close the garage door and keep them out. They barely even put up a fight...they actually let me drive over them. By morning they will have rebuilt their empire and will be back bigger and stingier than ever.

Tomorrow I return to work. Rested. Tomorrow night I return home. Exhausted. Such is life.

Apparently they're trying to convince google to give the government access to the google search records. It is an attempt at trying to uncover dodgy people of some description. As soon as they said that i figured I'd go through my own search history to see what exactly they would uncover about me and whether or not it actually amounted to anything about my character:

1. ACEA - "Association of Consulting Engineers Australia " - Engineer in Australia - worthwhile, may signal that I could be a terrorist or at least know something useful that could be used in terrorism circles; terrorism score - medium to high risk.

2. "DRAINS" - drainage program - again signifies I'm an engineer and am looking up street drainage systems; terrorism score - low risk.

3. "The Periodization System" - I like to keep fit and periodise my workouts to ensure there is no overloading of my CNS. Unless I'm using this method in a terrorism training camp this would not be of any use to the government at all; terrorism score - low risk.

4. "acid sulphate soils" "management" - I am investigating environmental management. Unless I'm trying to extract acid from soils below 10 metres AHD then there's no terrorism risk here at all; terrorism score - low risk.

5. "andes" "hike" - I am planning on going on a hike through the andes. Unless it's a fact finding mission for a planned terror attack on the andes. No issues here; terrorism score - low risk.



6. "carpal tunnel syndrome" - I have a few minor issues. Nothing major; terrorism score - low risk.

7. "Scarlett Johansson" - see below baby!. Terrorism score - medium to high - those breasts could start a war - they're locked and loaded.

8. "beer" "critter" - there's this new beer that someone told me about. At least it shows i'm not muslim puting me a lower risk category for terrorism suspect, despite the fact that most terrorism is Irish in origin anyway; terrorism score - low risk

9. "symphony of the planets" - I like classical music. This could make me a NAZI, but most likely not; terrorism score - low risk.

10. "poland "syndrome" - I have no idea why I was looking into this; terrorism score - low risk.

11. "disclosure" "media" - I am a big fan of media disclosure. Something the media isn't; terrorism score - low risk.

12. "hero" "verve pipe" - I like the song. It is dark, somber, depressing, and realistic; terrorism score - low risk.



13. "net" "shorthand" - my parents need a few pointers. It was irking me to wait 5 minutes while my mother typed "you"; terrorism score - low to medium risk (I could be trying to decipher a coded message afterall)

14. "duty of care" site:.au - I was trying to decipher the duty of care owed in contract law; terrorism score - low to medium risk (after all, reading up on laws is a bit suss - isn't it?)

15. "avy scott" - ok so I like my women with a bit of meat on them and with natural breasts; terrorism score - low risk.









16. "email programs" "google" - trying to work out what email programs work best with google search and with gnmail. Searching for google on google - the irony; terrorism score - low to medium risk (terrorists communicate by email afterall)

17. "armed forces" site:.au - trying to look into the army reserve. They pay for training courses for engineers which I need to do 150 hours of every three years to stay up to date with my qualifications; terrorism score - medium to high risk.



18. "davidoff" "cool water" - ok so I like to smell nice; terrorism score - low risk; gay score - medium risk.



19. "iced tea" "expiry date" - trying to work out how long homemade iced tea lasts. Still have no idea; terrorism score - low risk; gay score - medium risk.

20. "death to the heathen infidel Americans - praise to Allah in his glory" - ok so i made this one up; terrorism score - the CIA just kicked in my door and i'm currently typing this last sentence with my tongue - it is the only part of me that can still move because i'm tied to my chair and being beaten senseless by a large man.

The conclusion to all of this? I'm a heterosexual male engineer with metrosexual hypochondriac tendencies who is too lazy to bookmark frequently visited pages and would rather do a search instead. Terrorism suspect? I have no clue.

I managed to cut myself while opening a packet with a knife so that I could add something to the first aid kit in my car. Irony sucks.

To make matters worse - I've just cleaned my car inside and out - now there's blood all over the shop. It looks like i've been hauling dead bodies in it or something there's so much blood. Knife cuts seem to never stop bleeding.

One of my friends has had a miscarriage. I do not know what in the hell to even say to her - instead I've been avoiding her or just trying to ignore the fact it happened. What in the hell do i say ? What in the hell am I meant to say?

My new monkey magic DVD is great - there's a monkey magic moment for everything. Never has such dodgy voice dubbing and terrible storylines been so much fun. The only hitch came was when I was trying to express the joys of monkey to someone who had never seen it before - they didn't seem to quite understand the awe inspiring magic that is monkey.

But they don't understand Iron Chef either. Tisk-tisk.

"U.S. Rejects Any 'Truce' With Bin Laden" Associated Press Headline
"French President Chirac Threatens a Nuclear Response" Turks Daily News

Ok, so America launches and attack on some "terrorist training camps" that were set up by the CIA back during the war. Bin Laden blows up the americans in a few places here and there and he's the bad guy. America blows up a few countries here and there and it's the bad guy. Bin Laden offers a truce and he's still the bad guy? Come on people. Isn't "peace" what we've been "fighting" for? To what end are we fighting?

Ugh - the French! Fuck-me-dead! They were the Germans bitches in WW1 and WW2. They got their arses kicked by the Viet Cong in 'Nam. The last time the French did anything tough was when they kicked British arse in saving/freeing America from British rule. Now suddenly they're going to start a nuclear war? The French are reminding me of the quiet, softly spoken, polite, average achiever, regular joe at the postal service who suddenly one day, without rhyme or reason, shoots everyone in the town because he's been saving all of his pent up anger waiting for one small thing to set him off.

Who in the hell do the French even consider terrorists? One man's terrorist is another's freedom fighter. The last time there were any serious threats to france - it was from within - are they going to merely blow up the socioeconomicall disadvantaged? A clean slate may just be the order of the day for the world. We can start again - Noah's ark style.

E! Online:

Hilton has responded to Shuter's claims by calling him "an f--king liar" and downplayed the credibility of her email, stating that "whatever I write in email, it doesn't mean anything. It is just words I write."

During her deposition, currently available for viewing on TMZ.com, Hilton also demonstrated a remarkable deficit in her working knowledge of both geography and Greek culture.

When questioned on the last name of a companion identified as Terry, who was with her on the night of the reported run-in with Graff, Hilton replied, "It is like a weird Greek name. Like Douglas."

The party-loving socialite explained that she couldn't be bothered to remember the names of everyone in her crowd.

"I meet so many people. I don't even know some of my friends' names," Hilton said.

Later, Graff's lawyer, Paul Berra, asked her if she was aware that the false item had made its way into "U.K. publications."

"No," Hilton replied. "There is stuff in London."

Her lawyer, Larry Stein, jumped in to explain, "London is a U.K. publication."

"Right. U.K. Whatever," Hilton answered, per the deposition.

Hilton attributed her confusion about where the article might have been republished to the fact that she spent the summer in Europe, where she was faced with a language barrier.

"I was in Europe the whole summer, and all there is is like French," she explained. "I didn't see anything because I wasn't in America."

Though Hilton has backed down from her original version of her encounter with Graff, she claimed that she did exchange words with her rival on the night in question.

"I just said to her...she is old and should stay at home with her child instead of being at nightclubs with young people," Hilton said. "And just that--I just--what else did I say? Just that she is not cute at all."

She also claimed that Graff had threatened Latsis, claiming that she was going to "send Mexican people to come and beat the s--t out of him," and that she was intimidated by Graff after Latsis warned her that the diamond heiress might "do voodoo" on her.

"And I kind of do believe in that stuff a little bit, so I was a little bit scared about that," Hilton said. (Plus, voodoo is so not hot.)

Ah Paris - she sure is a smart one.

I'm not saying a thing.

These wasps have made a nest on the roller door to my garage. It's really funny - everytime i open it they get wrapped up in the metal as it rolls up. It fires them up and they go crazy buzzing around but they can't get out because of the door. Everytime I close it they get spun around some more and then fly all over the place trying to kill everything in sight.

I wonder if a wasp can get dizzy?

Hero - Verve Pipe

I can't believe that it was good for anyone, to me worth the wait
I doubt that anybody got their money's worth
But the attention sure felt great
With all eyes upon me, some filled with tears, some couldn't see

It burned like a cancer when the answer did occur to me
Creep from the cradle, but a hero's what I wanna be
Keep it moving people cause there's nothing more for you to see
I'm just a jerk, but a hero's what I wanna be yeah, oh yeah

Love me, love me sweet cowardice
Now that the thrill is mine for the moment
We really didn't need another suicide
Or a song explaining why, but it's not dignified
But I can't seem to kiss it goodbye

It burned like a cancer...
Keep it moving people...
It burned ...
Keep it.....
Erase this disaster even faster than you came to see
A creep from the cradle and a hero driven wanna be
For your abuse, but not intended for internal use
I'm just a jerk , but a hero's what I wanna be

And suddenly I'm a Scarlett Johansson fan - what movies is she in exactly?




Sourced from yahoo news. Image one is from reuters and image two from associated press - or maybe vice-versa if I've cocked it up.

I'm commenting in my own blog - God damn. I have no life.

These have to be the most comfortable t-shirts in existence. Believe the hype.

American Apparel - Fine Jersey Short Sleeve T-Shirt

Now if only I can train the Korean sweatshop workers to make such fine clothing apparel at an affordable price - I could undercut them and put them out of business. In the end the consumer will win. That is what America is all about is it not?

Ah capitalism - it is only a good thing if you're winning.

I've been enthralled by this documentary series currently showing on SBS television going through the trials and tribulations of a real life trial. That of one Michael Peterson.

Here is a loose background to the case for those not following the matter:

KATHLEEN PETERSON, (born Kathleen Hunt) wife of Michael Peterson, was found dead early Sunday morning (December 9, 2001) at the base of a staircase in their Forest Hills home. Police said Peterson told 911 operators his wife had been injured in a fall.

When rescue workers arrived at the home, Peterson's wife was lying dead on the floor.

A search of the property continued through Monday evening and details about what happened remain sketchy. Police will not say what kind of injuries Kathleen suffered. Her body was sent to the state medical examiner's office in Chapel Hill for an autopsy.

Durham police said that they would have a better idea of what happened if they could talk with Mike Peterson.

"We have not been able to interview Mr. Peterson. He has chosen not to answer any of our questions," said Lt. Ed Sarvis.

Police call the case suspicious and said that they will not rule it a homicide until they receive preliminary autopsy results.

source: Vance Holmes

Basically within the confines of the french documentary "The Staircase" Michael Peterson's version of events seems pretty suss. Equally as suss is the prosecutions case. Whichever way you look at it there are huge gaps in both sides. The most glaringly obvious gaps, in my opinion, in the defenses case are as follows:

1. Kathleen Peterson had a collapsed throat and minor, not major, defense wounds;
2. Michael Peterson is obviously lying about the 911 call - he said she was alive when he found her and that she died 15 minutes later - the blood had been dry for a few hours;
3. There was a shitload of blood, as is required to bleed to death obviously, but that much blood for falling down three steps and hitting her head?? Suss - very suss; and
4. His own legal defense team, right up until the trial, do not seem to take his word for a single thing he says unless someone else verifies it.

The gaps in the prosecutions case:

1. No murder weapon;
2. Contaminated crime scene, which is the norm, more so than the contrary;
3. A few issues with document control, such as, very important documents not making it from the FBI to the attorney's office etc.

Ok - when you put it into a few points like that he seems guilty as sin. But at no time does it feel like it's a clear-cut case. The jurors said they decided in a day it was not an accident - but as to whether or not they believed it was Michael Peterson who killed - it took them four more.

Post-verdict:

Two years later they have twice missed their deadlines for the appeal. Will the appeal ever happen? I have no idea.

All I can say is that I love a real life court room drama - much better than the Law and Order alternative by a long way. My only problem is that I was so enthralled with waiting to see how it all turned out that I bought the series on DVD so I could see the end of it. Now what in the hell am I going to do for the next 4 weeks on a Tuesday night when they put it on tv?

Monkey: 'And where shall I find him, this King Youth?'
Earth God: 'He has a huge semi-detached palace at Black Pine Ridge.' (1:5)

Tripitaka: 'You should live without fear. There's as much chance of good things as bad things.'
Sandy: 'It's a cheerful philosophy and I've heard it from people before. They're all dead now though.' (1:4)

Monkey Magic
Born from an egg on a mountain top,
Monkey is funky that ever popped,
He knew every magic trick under the sun,
Tease the Gods and everyone can have some fun.
Monkey magic, Monkey magic,
Monkey magic, Monkey magic,
Monkey magic, Monkey magic ooh!

What a cocky, saucey Monkey this one is.
All the Gods were angry and they punished him.
Until he was saved by a kindly priest,
And that was the start of their pilgrimage quest.
Monkey magic, Monkey magic,
Monkey magic, Monkey magic,
Monkey magic, Monkey magic,
Monkey magic, Monkey magic ooh!

Dogma:

LOKI

Leaving 'Alice in Wonderland' aside, look closely at 'Through the Looking Glass' - particularly 'The Walrus and the Carpenter' poem: what's the metaphorical meaning?

NUN

I wasn't aware there was one.

LOKI

Oh, but there is - it colorfully details the sham that is organized religion. The Walrus - with his girth and good-nature - obviously refers to either the Buddha, or - with his tusks - the lovable Hindu elephant god, Lord Ganesha. This takes care of the Eastern religions. The Carpenter is an obvious reference to Jesus Christ, who was purportedly raised the son of a carpenter. He represents the Western religions. And in the poem. what do they do? They dupe all the oysters into followmg them. Then. when the oysters collective guard is down. the Walrus and the Carpenter shuck and
devour the helpless creatures, en masse. I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following faiths based on these mythological figures insures the destruction of one's inner-being.

BARTLEBY sits amongst a row of seats by one of the arrival gates. He eats popcorn and stares at...

A steady stream of TRAVELERS, exiting the gate, meeting lovedones, family.

LOKI

Organized religion destroys who we are or who we can be by inhibiting our actions and decisions out of fear of an intangible parent-figure who shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says "No, no!"

Bartleby smiles at the meet-and-greets, warmed. Loki saddles up beside him, kneeling on one of the seats, facing the Nun.

LOKI

'Through the Looking Glass' - a children's tale? I think not.

NUN

(really dazed)

I've... I've never really thought about it like that...

(beat; shocked; off her cassock)

What have I been doing with my life...?'.

LOKI

Don't look back. Just get out there and taste life.

(off donation can)

Leave this for the unenlightened. Poverty is for the gullible - it's another way the church is trying to control you. You take that money you've been collecting for your parish reconstruction and go get yourself a nice piece of ass. You deserve it.

The Nun nods at him, and saunters off, obviously grappling with something. A passerby tries to stick money in her can, but she yanks it away. Loki faces the proper direction in his seat and plops down beside the still-transfixed Bartleby.

I was talking to my brother the other day - he is not exactly the most computer/technological savvy of people, in fact, within the past few weeks we've had the conversation of: "This internet is different to the one I'm used to - what have you done with yahoo?", but I digress, he was all keen to become a part of this mp3 player revolution. His friends were getting them. They were all raving about how you could put all of your cds on something that fits into your pocket. This whiz-bang ipod type contraption. The conversation went something along the lines of:

Him: "how many songs can you fit on an ipod?"
Me: "it depends on the quality of the song, at CD quality, say the Ipod for around $400-500 is a 30GB one, say each song is about 5-6 minutes in length, this would be around 6000 songs, give or take about a 1000 songs because of the variables. They're pretty damn good"
Him: "But I have over 400 CD's. I have way more songs than that. My computer can hold more than that. That's expensive for so little songs."

It then occured to me that he was probably right. We've been programmed to accept the current technology and say "wow". When a new ipod comes out we go "wow - it's so much better than the last one". But to the outsider they're still lacking that extra something.

Language has failed me - Suheir Hammad

I am told to believe nothing I read
Then everything I read
I am given my own face to be wary of
I am told to fear colors as alerts
I am told over and over
Iraq is not Palestine
Kabul is not New York

The photos
Women Raped
Posed as girls gone wild
This is entertainment This is staged This is recorded
Men Chained
Do words such as humiliation and torture
Truly fit the immensity of these acts?
What happens to those who survive?
What happens to those responsible?

Haiti is not Chechnya
Chiapas is not East L.A.
Iraq is not Palestine
Over and over I am told

I am given a vantage point and a lens and instructed
Do not move Do not look up Do not look down

I am falling

2.

No connections here
No illuminated parallels
Two different histories and two different peoples
Make no links
Do not confuse the issues

Only confuse the people

For 56 years Israel has legitimized
This type of behavior
Sanctioned violence in the name of a god
Who does not have enough love for us all
A god who chooses sides
A god who has favorites and chosen ones
A god who cuts deals and shuffles souls
The type of god who does not answer prayers
Who understands only one language
A god who does not worry his beautiful mind with
Such ugliness
I am told this is America’s god

The photos from Rafah Palestine
It is 1948 and 2004 in the same frame
Their eyes say to the camera
What will you do with this pain?
Where will you take it?
Can you take it from me?

This space between the lens and the subjects
Is concentrated with pleas for witness
With promises of cycles unbroken
With children’s bicycles under the rubble of once were homes

Another level of exile is being constructed

And I am falling

Aaagghh, ya Phalesteen
What is it about us they hate so much?
This face? These eyes? This obstinate refusal to die?
How much trauma can one nation endure with the world staring?
Some mouths open in shock
Others silent and sneering
While women scream at a frequency the living cannot hear
Again? Again ya Phalesteen?

3.

How fucked up is it that I have to choose between ending
One occupation or another?
Partition my time and portion my information

I have to make Nice Play Fair and Polite
When I want to tear open my chest to void it of this emptiness
This ache has eaten into my head and wears down my dreams
My friends worry I am not eating enough
Am taking too much on Too much in
I find nowhere to rest this responsibility

If I say nothing I am complicit
If I say something I am isolated as extreme
As a theorist in conspiracy
As if war is ever a coincidence
As if genocide simply happens

This is about oil and land and water
This is about illusion and the taking on of airs
The poor once again the munitions in rich men’s cannons

This is about light and dark
There is no black and white in humanity

I am told
Venezuela is not Cuba
Rwanda is not Kurdistan

I am not the woman kneeling
In front of soldiers and their cameras and their weapons
I am not the child shot in the head by the Israeli Defense Forces
I am not the starving AIDS inflicted mother
Praying I live longer than my children
So they will not be orphaned and sick and have to bury me
I am not the child who watched
Her family chopped to death in Lebanon in Sudan in Nicaragua
I am not the father who leaves his children so as not to hear their
empty Bellies call out Baba, where is the bread?

I am the woman whose taxes outfitted this tragedy
The American the Authority does not speak for
The Arab the Arab leaders do not speak for
The woman whose shouts of Not in My Name
Were spit back at me as a slogan of the misguided at best
I am the girl from Brooklyn told to mind her business
I am the poet in search of new words
And a new world Not Mars

4.

We use antiquated terms that cannot stretch enough to touch this truth
We have not learned from the past enough to not repeat it

I am told it has always been this way
War and Pillage
Rape is older than prostitution
And prostitution is the oldest politic
The way the world has always been
The pimps and those they pimp

The human race has always left
Those who fall behind

If I am to survive then
I learn from the present
From the future promised

We learn to live with madness
One cannot be healthy in a sick world
Only navigate illnesses Only medicate wounds
Pray you are not contagious
Try to hurt no one

My elders say dissent has always been watched
Radical ideas have always been recorded
But even those who have lived on the margins admit
Under breath It has never been this bad

Not everyone is suffering True
Most thirst
A few swim in pools that fake connection to seas
Most starve
I throw away meals I have no appetite for
You can shop from your couch and eat food fast
And never think about anything other than your credit card debt
And the next hour’s purchases
Shop and stop asking questions
I have envied this stupor
Even knowing it is the least honorable suicide
Even knowing its apathy is another kind of murder

5.

Sometimes all you can do is inhale and exhale
Life a shallow version of its potential
Sometimes all you can do is search for life where you are
In the city A flash of yellow on the basketball court
The divine geometry in the pattern of a girl’s hijab

For a week I have been cleaning and knifing enough
Parsley for tabbouleh to feed hundreds
I pray over the green
That what I make will feed those in need of a meal

There is still love in us
The proof is that we are watching it die
There is still hope in us
Hope is there in my sisters’ eyes
There is still enough resistance in us
To create a world where there is no
Your people or my people
But our people
Our people who kill Our people who are killed

I somehow know love will save us
The proof is in the stories not broadcast
The poems not published
The truth between the lies
The stories whispered in the dusk of this day

I know somehow love will save us
Though I can’t find the passion or desire in my body to make it
There is still a source for peace deeply embedded in this chaos

I know love will save us
Though words fail to point out how

Amazingly I still pray
To a god I envision to be larger than any nation Any religion

And I still hunt for language to gather into a poem
That I pray will feed those like me
In need of proof they are not alone

I went to athletes foot to get some new sport shoes. They proded me, they probed me, that measured the heat patter of my foot, they measured my step length, type, etc they measured the arch on my foot, etc etc etc...in the end they decided I had a high arch and required an insert that conveniently could be purchased there, a normal step, a normal width foot, etc and was a size 10. All of the size 10 shoes were too big - I suggested to the girl that all of my shoes were a 9.5, she quickly responded with, but you'll grow into them! To which I replied: "i'm 25 - i have no more growing."

I walked out with a normal running show that was a size 9.5 - no insert necessary.

So much for progress.

Land of the dead has to be one of the most enthralling, nerve racking, films, horror or otherwise, that I have seen for a long time. Let's just say zombies who can think suddenly get a hell of a lot more scary than they ever have been before.

They're scarier than the fast zombies. They're scarier than the slow zombies. They're damn scary!

FBW seems ok after week one.

Only time will tell the rest.

I've given my parents an old mobile phone and signed thme up to the net. Big mistake. Now my mobile phone, which I now call "the bat phone", has been ringing constantly as I give out computer advice, mobile phone advice, and internet advice.....next time i'll take things one step at a time.

I know - needs some refining - but I like to refine on the fly after getting a feel for it first.

We will see how it goes after next month.

PPL;Week 2

Day 1

BB Bench x 1 @ 3-5;
Miltary press x 1 @ 3-5;
Decl DB Bench x 2 @ 6-10;
Incl DB Bench x 2 @ 6-10;
CG Bench x 2 @ 6-10;
Dips x 2 till fail.

Day 2

Dead x 1 @ 3-5;
BB Rows x 1 @ 3-5;
Shrugs x 1 @ 3-5;
Preacher Curl x 1 @ 3-5;
BB Curl x 2 @ 6-10;
One Arm Preacher Curl x 2 @ 6-10;
Lat Pull x 4 @ 6-10;
DB Rows x 4 @ 6-10;
Chins x 2 till fail.

Day 3

Press x 2 @ 3-5;
Ext x 4 @ 6-10;
Curl x 4 @ 6-10;
Lunge x 3 @ 6-10;
Lunge x 1 till fail.

FBW;Week 1

Day 1

Hack Squat x 2 @ 12-15;
Leg press x 2 @ 12-15;
Miltary press x 2 @ 12-15;
DB press x 2 @ 12-15;
DB rows x 4 @ 12-15;
DB curls x 4 @ 12-15;
Pullups x 4 @ 12-15
Situps x 4 till fail.

Day 2

Lunge x 4 @ 12-15;
Squats x 4 @ 12-15;
Military press x 4 @ 12-15;
DB rows x 4 @ 12-15
Situps x 4 till fail.

Day 3
Decl DB Bench x 4 @ 12-15;
Dead x 4 @ 12-15;
Pull ups x 4 till fail;
Leg raise x 4 till fail.

"Evie" - Vanda/Young

I got some money in my pocket
I got my car keys in my hand
I got myself a couple of tickets
To see a rockin' rollin' band
Come on girl just get on your shoes
We're gonna hear some sound
Come on babe you know there ain't no time
Don't mess around

Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down
Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down

You got the body of a woman
The way you move is like a queen
You got the face to raise a riot
And still you're only seventeen
But little girl you're oh so shy
You hardly make a sound
Come on babe you know there ain't no time
Don't mess around

Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down
Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down

So won't you try it baby
I'll take you by the hand
'Cos there's a world out there for you
To know and understand
You gotta chance so take it
You gotta pick and choose
Why don't you just give me one more try
You know you can't lose

Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down
Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down

You got the body of a woman
You nearly make me lose my breath
You know you give me such a feeling
You almost scare me half to death
But little girl you're so reserved
You hardly make a sound
C'mon baby don't you be so shy don't mess around

Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down
Evie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang downEvie Evie Evie Evie let your hair hang down

Let your hair hang downLet your hair hang downLet your hair hang down
Let your hair hang downLet your hair hang downLet your hair hang down
Let your hair hang downLet your hair hang downLet your hair hang down
Let your hair hang downLet your hair hang downLet your hair hang down
Let your hair hang downLet your hair hang downLet your hair hang down
Let your hair hang downLet your hair hang downLet your hair hang down


Yvonne "Evie" - My Niece.

Ah weddings - where else, other than the footy show, can you get a bunch of drunken men wearing pink, or shades there of, and actually smiling about it.

Ok - stupid rhetorical question time:

Say your director is there, or say, any type of work superior, ah hell, say any person what is in the toilet making small talk while urinating into a urinal, as is done, how long do you wait after having finished urinating yourself to continue and finish the conversation that was started mid-urination before it becomes rude to continue being there while said person is still urinating?

Do you wait until said person is finished talking? Do you wait until finished person is finished urinating? Do you just end the conversation abruptly as soon as you finish urinating? Do you politely say I'll see you later? Do you offer to help said person shake it off? How long does it go on for? Is there a time limit?

I've been driving around so slowly I could be driving miss daisy. Lately it's been wet on the roads and cars seem to be crashing all around me. My brothers girlfriend has had a car crash. My friend ended up in a wheelchair after having a car crash. The car infront of me lost it on the roundabout today - so i slowed down to 25km/hr around the roundabout and lost it slightly myself.

But I cannot win! The slower I seem to go the more eratic my driving is becoming. Tomorrow I'm going to go back to driving without a care in the world - watch out world here I come!

"This guy's walking down the street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can't get out.

A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, 'Hey you. Can you help me out?' The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, 'Father, I'm down in this hole can you help me out?' The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

Then a friend walks by, 'Hey, Joe, it's me can you help me out?' And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, 'Are you stupid? Now we're both down here.' The friend says, 'Yeah, but I've been down here before and I know the way out." - John Spencer

Call me naive - but i didn't realise people actually put notches on the bedpost.

To beat bushfire hazards and the like - I took the road less traveled. Old Putty Road. It is fanfuckingtastic! It is this really wide, moderately winding for about 10 km, road with barely a car on it. It has all of this majestic scenery. It is really great. I have no idea why everyone I know gives it such a bad name. Sure it takes a smidgen longer than the freeway - but the journey is so much more enjoyable. There's no falling to sleep because of boredom. It is really cool.

Adam's Ode to Old Putty Road

O - h it is a pleasure to drive on such an old fashioned
L - ong and winding road to your
D-estination.

P-erfect scenery envelopes the road
U-ntil you reach the end
T-hen it opens up to reveal
T-he city of Sydney and
Y-et all the while this road retains that country feel.

R-ising through the hills
O-ne corner at a time
A-ll the while
D-riving into new sights

I'd pass judgement or make some sarcastic comment - but let's face it - the man is over 60 and still doesn't look like he's in that bad of shape. He just needs to lose a little fat.

Where has the time gone? Before i know it I will be nothing but a distant memory - if that. Time is all relative - ah stating the obvious.

Happy new year!

p.s original sin is a really bad movie - in all honesty - what were they thinking? Sure Angelina Jolie has some dodgy movies to her name, but all in all, I usually consider her decent at her worst and good at her best. Antonio Banderas is another matter altogether - i could not even name but a few movies I have ever seen him in and with them good is not exactly the words I would use, in fact good isn't even a plural at all.

How long does homemade iced tea last while refrigerated?