My Manifesto: The Incoherent Ramblings of a Madman

According to Popular Mechanics, these are the 25 skills every man should have:

1. Patch a radiator hose [i can see this would come in handy]
2. Protect your computer [from what?]
3. Rescue a boater who has capsized [the fuckers should have learnt to swim before they got on the boat]
4. Frame a wall [handy for making a quick buck on the property market]
5. Retouch digital photos [i never have a bad photo]
6. Back up a trailer [ok - so i'm lacking here; but i get there eventually]
7. Build a campfire [yup - with petrol and lots of it!!]
8. Fix a dead outlet [hmm...would be handy; but somewhat illegal without the qualifications]
9. Navigate with a map and a compass [i love orienteering - does that make me a nerd?]
10. Use a torque wrench [who doesn't?]
11. Sharpen a knife [not a knife fan - but the knifes i have are sharp]
12. Perform CPR [especially on bikini models']
13. Fillet a fish [i can - but not a fan of fishhands']
14. Maneuver a car out of a skid [i struggled in the ice]
15. Get a car unstuck [with goo remover?]
16. Back up data [yup]
17. Paint a room [yup]
18. Mix concrete [is this really an essential skill for life? i kick arse at planning concrete mixing at least]
19. Clean a bolt-action rifle [ummmmmmmm........this must be an american/third world country thing]
20. Change oil and filter [i like the idea of doing this - but not the impracticality of doing this]
21. Hook up an HDTV [easy peasy]
22. Bleed brakes [again...i like the idea of doing this - but not the impracticality of doing this]
23. Paddle a canoe [by using an oar? or am i missing something?]
24. Fix a bike flat [yup]
25. Extend a wireless network [this is essential why?]