My Manifesto: The Incoherent Ramblings of a Madman

The 80's themed party in Brisbane was really good.

Karaoke, twister, dodgy old clothes and/or costumes....copious amounts of alcohol - what more could you ever want? The highlight of the evening was me and Jane singing "Somewhere over the Rainbow" as every dog in the street howled in unison - twice in a row. I have no idea why that song has anything even to do with the 80's...but it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Heineken has a lot to answer for:



The words for the night were meant to be:

"Relax"
"Who you gunna call?"
"Love is a battlefield"
"Video killed the radio star"

Somehow the words for the night always ended up being some part of the sexual anatomy, I'd like to blame Heineken for this as well, but that was really as a result of the QLD education system, or lack there of.

This weekend is onto the Hunter Valley wine region...."fancy a glass of red old chap?" *he says in mock posh voice*.

I'm going to go out on a limb here, well, for my generation x verging on generation y upbringing, and say that South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut - really sucked pig motherfucker arse! Thank Christ they brought out Team America to redeem their movie credentials.

(and i have no idea why it's taken me this many years to be bothered watching it)

i had the security guards at a bank pull a gun on me the other day - apparently I looked like I was going to rob them when I was walking past carrying a towel. Must've been one dangerous looking towel.

https://stgeorge.com.au/online/LoginUpdatedoNow

The actual link http://eragonpotter.com/images/omomamaomobaba/nobsmallthingoh
/causeigotyouomomama/stgeorge.com.au/update.htm is different from the host in the link text....

You're damn straight it's different. Damn hackers could do with a spelling lesson or two as well.

p.s please don't hurt my website Mr Hacker - I'm only joking on the whole spelling lesson thing. i love you and all of your work, I'm especially fond of saving the President of Nigeria and the enlargement of my penis :)

Ok, so the new training routine needs some re-arrangement to iron out the bugs...


And in other news...apparently lending your cousin a phone means you're a terrorist. Which by my reckoning means that, by lending my brother a phone once that I'm a freaking baptist. What in the hell kind of trumped up charge is lending your cousin a phone???? They're only going to breed hate in a whole new generation of people.

I keep thinking I'm better - then i eat solid food and it comes right back out.

Damn you to hell sickness! Damn you to hell!.....

My new programme:

Day 1 - Chest
*Warm up:
WUA - 3x10 BW chin-ups;
WUB - 3x10 BW dips.

Working:
W1 - DB Bench Press - 8x3;
W2 - BB Decline Bench Press - 5x5;
W3 - Cable Incline fly - 3x10-12;
W4 - Weighted Dips - 3x10-12.

Day 2 - Back
Warm up:
WUA - 3x10 BW chin-ups;
WUB - 3x10 BW push-ups.

Working:
W1- Weighted W/G Chin-ups (or lat pull-downs)- 8x3;
W2 - BB Bent Row - 5x5;
W3- Row Machine - 3x10-12;
W4- Weighted Dips - 3x10-12.

Day 3 - Quad Dominant Legs
Warm up:
WUA - 3x10 BW chin-ups;
WUB - 3x10 BW dips;
WUC - 3x10 DB front squats.

Working:
W1- Back Squats -8x3;
W2- Uni-lateral Leg Press-5x5;
W3- Weighted step-ups-4x10-12

Day 4 - Ham Dominant Leg Day/Shoulders & Some Bullshit Accessory Work
Warm up:
WUA - 3x10 BW chin-ups;
WUB - 3x10 BW push-ups.

Working:
W1 - DB Military press-8x3
W2 - Deadlift- 5x5
W3 - DB Hammer curls- 2x10-12
W4 - Triceps extensions - 2x10-12

Day 5 - Full body workout
WUA - 3x10 BW chin-ups;
WUB - 3x10 BW dips.

Working:
W1 - Front Squats- 3x12
W2 - BB Bench Press- 3x12
W3 - Glute Ham Raises- 3x12
W4 - Spider Rows- 3x12
W5 - Farmer's Walks- 3x12
W6 - Incline DB Curls- 3x12

*The idea behind the push-pull warm up sets is that I believe that simple bodyweight exercises should be a foundation for most upper body work.


I'll sleep when I'm dead............

I've often looked around the gym and been annoyed to no-end by all of the wankers walking around in tight t-shirts thinking they're tough; when quite clearly, I could kick their arse. I looked in the mirror the other day and realised that I am one of those wankers walking around the gym in a tight t-shirt. I guess the only thing that separates them from me is that my t-shirt is usually three (3) years old, has worn patches that are nearly forming holes, and the occasional dark stain here and there.

Now that I've realised the problem - I blame the t-shirt manufacturers'. They need to make a t-shirt that grows with the person - or at the very least a t-shirt that screams at you one day:

"Hey dude! I'm getting too tight! Get a bigger t-shirt or you'll look like one of those wankers who walks around the gym thinking he's tough!!! HURRY! TIMES RUNNING OUT!"

Ok...cancel that last request for the Argentine nanny student...i'm holding out for the Brazilian dance instructor...;)

The last flatmate, who was a female nurse, left because my other flatmate decided to pick on her - apparently, it's the little things about her that are annoying:

1. She would leave her shoes in the common area and he would occasionally trip on them [open your damn eyes];
2. She would leave a teabag in a mug overnight on the sink with the intention of putting it in the bin in the morning [wait till she puts it in the bin].

I have no idea why in the fuck he found these traits so bad.

She was a female nurse! I could put up with tripping on shoes and old teabags till the cows come home as long as she keeps having hot female nurse friends over! Surely this would negate these minor issues ? Is it possible my flatmate is gay? How does one really tell if someone is just "from the city" or is actually gay? Would it even matter? But alas, she has moved on.

Her replacement was an engineer. A male engineer, I should begrudgingly add. He moved in without paying rent or bond. Two weeks into the living arrangement still had paid neither rent or bond. One day prior to owing his next lot of rent broke the remote control and started punching holes in all of the walls and doors and threatening my other flatmate. He was removed by the police.

BUT on the upside - the female police officer who turned up was great! Never really had a thing for female police, their lesbian shaved heads sort of turn me off them for the most part - but not this one. We sat there on the lounge talking while watching Family Guy on DVD while the male officer was the go between both flatmates and helped the demolition man move out.

It seems the female nurse with hot nurse friends who also had hot beauty therapist friends who had hot hair dresser friends wasn't such a bad flatmate after all :)

The benefits of hindsight.

NEXT on the agenda is convincing my flatmate that a female South American exchange student, despite not having a job, surely will be a good investment for our future.