My Manifesto: The Incoherent Ramblings of a Madman

It has been a while since I've posted anything, due to no fault of my own, I have had no net access, infact, for the most part I've had no electricity or food.

It has been an interesting past few weeks - Marky Mark Latham (Labor leader) - decided he would give a speech which drew heavily from Bill Clinton's state of the union address a few years back and Marky Mark Latham has been accused of plagiarism by Jacko "Honest John" Johnny Howard (current Prime Minister). After a bit of investigative journalism the press came up with the fact that Bill Clinton actually plagiarism or "borrowed" ideas from Nixon and Nixon "borrowed" these ideas from Winston Churchill - so when all is said and done the aftermath from all of this has shown that no one in politics has come up with any new ideas for an entire fucking century - this isn't exactly news to my ears - it's actually quite obvious.

The only thing I can't understand is how Churchill had a dream that every 12 year old would have access to the internet - that Churchill must've been eons ahead of his time, and for that, he gets my nod of approval. Churchill gets my vote for President, Prime Minister, and as the patron saint of original thought for his trail blazing ideas that no politician has managed to better.

The bulldogs managed to get off the hook for the rape allegations - the police gave them a pretty damning report which basically said they were guilty as sin, but proving they were guilty as sin would never hold-up in court - this sends a few strong messages out their to all of the women of the world: 1. sports teams like to pack rape women (as most people know they always have); 2. If you get pack raped and you want to report it make sure that it's a lesser team than a national one, so that way they won't have the money to pay for good legal advice and smear your previous good name; and 3. If you do happen to get pack raped by a national sporting team make damn sure that there are video cameras taping it because that is about the only hope in hell you have of having your case make it to court to get any type of justice.

There's good news in Iraq finally - the leaders of the Iraqi prisons have been reprimanded for treating their prisoners like animals. Ok - so it was a long shot, but hell, it's as close to good news as is going to come out of Iraq for a very long time. It is about time George Bush appoligised - it is something he should have done a long time ago - hopefully they carry through with some actions.


As you may well have guessed, I'm back in CIVILISATION! CIVILISATION I TELLS YA! (albeit temporarily) What a traumatic experience I've been through the past few weeks. It went pear-shaped from the beginning:

1. The security people decided to pick on me so I had to take off my shoes (the lining of them was checked for plastic explosives), my belt (apparently it is considered a WMD), open all of my hand luggage, surrender an old car key I had on my key-ring (apparently car-keys are considered a WMD these days), I had to surrender an ornamental bullet I have had on my key-ring half of my life because of it's sentimental value (again, apparently ornaments on key-rings are considered WMD these days).

2. The entire time I was in Bourke I couldn't breathe - so much for fresh country air - it was so dust laden I choked the entire time. I have actually come to the pristine area of SYDNEY to get fresh air.

3. It is impossible to clean ones self in Bourke - you shower in water that smells like something someone has brought up after a night out on the town - then get out of the shower and put your foot down on a pile of dust, which as you guessed, turns to mud, then you dry off and walk away knowing that you're as dirty as you were before you had a shower.

4. I have been surviving in $30 per day - this doesn't sound so bad under normal circumstances - but it was terrible. Food there is very expensive, let's face it, it's the middle of no where! so they can charge whatsoever they want to charge and get away with it. With my meager amount of money I was getting by on two (2) meals of takeaway shite. So I've been mal-nourished, and actually putting on weight because of it. With little exercise, a poor diet, and working 10 hr days 7 days per week I was quickly becoming very ill. I don't think I could have handled much more of it.

5. Apparently I'm meant to legally get $85 per day - something my boss does not seem to comprehend - now all I need to work out is who I can annonysmouly dob him into :)